Reviewed by Larissa

TITLE: The Endgame

AUTHOR: Riley Hart

NARRATOR:  Iggy Toma

PUBLISHER: Self-published

LENGTH: 10 hours and 50 minutes

RELEASE DATE: April 26, 2021

BLURB: 

Weston

When I left home, I swore I’d never hide anything about myself again. From college, to law school, to the United States Senate representing California, I’ve done it all as an out gay man. So, when I’m in DC and see a beautiful guy at the hotel bar, I don’t hesitate to proposition him…right before he runs out on me, leaving his sunglasses behind like my very own Cinderfella.

Anson

I’ve always known I’m gay, but never acted on it. Pretending isn’t easy, but it means I can keep playing football. No one has ever guessed my secret until the gorgeous man at a bar in DC. At least he doesn’t know who I am – the best tight end in the NFL, playing for the Atlanta Lightning. Though my identity doesn’t stay a secret from him for long.

Between texts and late-night phone calls, we get to know each other. West’s the only person who knows all the parts of me, just like I know his. When he asks for one night together so he can show me what it’s like to be with a man, I can’t say no. But once isn’t enough, and we keep sneaking around together – brief encounters, in California, Georgia, or DC, filled with passionate touches and whispered truths.

I never thought I’d have love. West never thought he’d want it. Now we’re all in with each other, but he still has time left in his Senate term. I have contract obligations to fulfill, and I’m closeted. We don’t even live in the same state. The odds are stacked against us, but if there’s one thing I know, it’s how to win. He’s the endgame in the biggest challenge of my life, the one I’m banking my future happiness on. 

REVIEW: 

I’ve read a lot of stories with a closeted professional athlete as the main character.  Admittedly, I have a penchant for this type of M/M sports romance, when one of the main characters is torn between the pressure of the game and the pressure to be himself.  However, this oft-used trope tends to get similar treatment from book to book.  The trajectory of the relationship follows a well-plotted course to the inevitable HEA.  

In The Endgame, Riley Hart manages to accomplish what I didn’t think was possible:  she makes a trite trope into something altogether new. The man behind the mic for The Endgame audiobook is the incomparable Iggy Toma.  He amplifies everything novel, beautiful, painful and real about this glorious telling of Anson Hawkins and Weston Calloway’s against-the-odds romance.

Anson is the best tight end in the NFL, playing for the Atlanta Lightning.  He accomplished that achievement while carrying the burden of keeping his sexuality a secret. He hasn’t even spoken out loud the word “gay” about himself, no less allowed himself to act on it. 

We hear the familiar refrain from Anson: “I just want to play”.  Anson plays for his deceased father who put a football in Anson’s hands when he was a child, told him he would be a star and couldn’t wait to see him when he made it to the NFL. He plays because he loves it, even more than himself and his desire to live an authentic life.  He keeps his sexuality secret because of misplaced guilt over his younger brother’s paralyzing accident and because he thinks his identity is inextricably linked to football.  Anson believes football is the only thing he’s good at, the only thing that’s truly his, and he doesn’t know who he is without it.

Anson won’t risk football or losing his identity, not realizing that he’s already sacrificed himself for the game.  But when he meets West, the out and proud Senator who refuses to compromise himself or his sexuality for anyone or anything, all bets are off.  Anson’s certainty and resolve begin to waver.  He finally begins to admit to himself that he is just so very tired of being scared, of pretending to be something he’s not.  Living a lie equals holding his breath all the damn time, and he desperately needs to exhale.

While Anson’s burden from hiding and fear of getting caught are part and parcel of the closeted athlete trope, I’ve never experienced it so acutely as I did in The Endgame.  Somehow, Ms. Hart creates a palpable tension around Anson that strikes a chord deep in the reader.  It’s pain, abject fear and utter loneliness and we feel it deeply. Anson’s heartbreaking sacrifice feels like a tangible thing.  He is petrified and that anxious vibration resonates with the reader.  We viscerally experience Anson’s battle between his desire to be himself and to love West out in the open, and his need to hold onto football, his link to his father and the public perception of him as a great football player, not “that gay football player”.

Iggy Toma’s narration provides the perfect counterpoint to Anson and West’s emotional struggles.  As always, Mr. Toma provides a consistent, easy distinction between the two men’s voices.  He imbues both voices with emotional depth that enables a strong, plausible connection between the men.  His pacing, inflections and intonations are spot-on and his vocal performance as a whole shows off his experience as a narrator.  But there are many subtle and remarkable aspects to his performance here that are worth noting.

Mr. Toma has a recognizable voice, deep and a bit gravelly with an undertone of matter-of-factness. It’s not quite sarcasm, although it can be that at times;  it’s more like an easygoing, straightforward delivery with a hint of “something” riding underneath. What that “something” is varies from book to book, character to character.  That’s where he takes his usual, distinctive voice and molds it into something unique for each character he voices.

Superficially, Anson and West’s voices seem similar except for pitch difference; West’s voice is slightly higher than Anson’s. But as you listen, that latent “something” surfaces and the vocal texture Mr. Toma delivers becomes evident.  His narration provides complex emotional layers that augment Ms. Riley’s portrayal of Anson and West. 

Anson’s voice shows off more of Mr. Toma’s lower register, deep and rough, laced with that sense of fear and frustration that is a critical part of Anson’s character. Mr. Toma uses a higher pitched tone for West that conveys an energy that Anson’s voice lacks.  Mr. Toma channels through it West’s rebellion against his conservative father and the naysayers that doubt and oppose his success as a gay man in life and in politics. This contrasts with the slower pacing and dispirited resignation that comes through in Anson’s voice, reflective of his downtrodden spirit.

There’s a sadness to West that Mr. Toma infuses in his voice as well, reflective of West’s buried hurt from the rejection of his parents.  West may be out and proud, but he’s figuratively closeted by his father’s refusal to acknowledge him other than to loudly and vehemently confirm he is ashamed of West and renounce their connection.  But in both West and Anson’s voices, Mr. Toma provides an undercurrent of strength as both men realize they don’t have to be alone, they are better together, and they can conquer their demons with each other’s unwavering support.

Iggy Toma’s gorgeous voice and expressive performance creates an immersive experience in The Endgame audiobook. While I loved everything about this opposites attract, age gap story through Ms. Hart’s text alone, it’s better paired with Mr. Toma’s euphonious tones. Anson and West are a captivating, smoking hot couple that just “fit” despite all the reasons why they shouldn’t, and the trajectory of their romance, propelled by Mr. Toma’s expert vocal performance is nothing short of engrossing. 

RATING:

BUY LINKS: 

Amazon

Audible