Reviewed by Valerie

TITLE:  Lost at the Crossing

SERIES:  Rail Riders #2

AUTHOR:  Nicky James

PUBLISHER:  Self-Published

LENGTH:  349 pages

RELEASE DATE:  November 29, 2021

BLURB:

Two lost boys. Two long years. One path back to each other.

Elian has lost two major anchors in his life, and he can’t figure out how to get back on track, so he takes to the rails, trying to outrun his struggles. The farther he runs, the deeper he sinks, losing himself more and more until a random phone call reminds him, he isn’t as alone as he thought. There is someone out there who still cares—Tyler.

Two years ago, Tyler lost more than his best friend. He lost the other half of his heart. He knows Elian’s struggles, and he now knows Elian is alive. When his rider friends offer to help, he’s hesitant. They don’t know as much about Elian as they should, and it’s Tyler’s fault for shutting them out. Too many people might scare Elian off.
Besides, how can he explain to his friends his desperation to find Elian when his feelings are so new and unexplored?
Tyler is convinced he only needs one person to mend his wounded heart—Elian.

** Lost at the Crossing is a new adult gay romance story of first love between two inexperienced boys. It’s a story of found family and lifelong friendships. It explores tropes including hurt/comfort, friends-to-lovers, two virgins, second chance romance, and demisexual awakening. It has angst. Let’s be honest, it’s me. It’s inevitable. Lost at the Crossing is the second book in the Rail Riders series. It can be read as a standalone but may be better enjoyed after reading End of the Line. **

REVIEW:

I couldn’t wait to have time with you. We spent almost two years meeting up on occasion and trading letters, and I treasured every second.” He touched his chest over his heart. “It gave me this warmth inside, this exhilaration I’d never felt before. Even when we didn’t speak a whole lot, being with you was the most contentment I’ve ever known. Seeing you was how I imagined coming home must feel to normal people. You gave me this sense of relief. Of comfort. Peace.”

One hundred and twenty-four days. I’ve been a paragon of patience (snort!) for 124 excruciating days since finishing End of the Line, waiting for Tyler and Elian’s love story and wondering why Elian disappeared.

It’s becoming difficult to write original reviews for an author extraordinaire whose every novel pulls hard on my heart strings. I’m running out of descriptors that accurately convey how much I love Nicky James’ work. Lost at the Crossing is an exceptional novel about the extraordinary lengths Tyler goes through to find his lost friend, Elian, and the remarkable fortitude and courage Elian uses to pull himself through hellacious life circumstances. It’s more than a tale of love, though. It’s also about the strength of found family – the tight bonds of these literal ride-of-die friends – that ultimately provides the unconditional love and support both Tyler and Elian need to heal from the pain that has individually caused them to both feel so alone in the world. For Willow, Dodger, Killian, and now Leo, there’s no way they’ll allow Tyler and Elian to face life alone anymore.

As we know from End of the Line, fellow freight hopper, Elian, disappeared from Tyler’s life. They both rode the rails and traveled across Canada – Tyler usually with the Rail Riders crew and Elian hooking up with them from time to time. When their paths crossed, they built an awkward friendship that was maintained when they went their separate ways with letters they left each other in hidden spots near the rails.

It’s now been nearly two years since Elian disappeared, but Tyler never loses hope. His heart is breaking and he’s dragging mine along for the ride, thank you very much. He’s losing bits of himself as time passes and he continues to know nothing of Elian’s whereabouts. He feels guilty, reasoning he must’ve done something to upset Elian the last time he saw him. His friends don’t quite understand Tyler’s ceaseless need to find Elian but they’re supportive, nonetheless. Ride or die, there for their brother.

Elian’s arduous mental health struggles leave him incapacitated. He wants to reach out to Tyler but he can’t. They had discussed some of their scars from their pasts but there’s so much Tyler doesn’t know, and the mystery of Elian’s life adds a degree of mystery to the book.

“How could I express what it was like to be stuck in a vortex with no tether, unable to stop spinning? How could I tell Tyler what it felt like to have a constant, underlying need to flee while not knowing where to go or how to stop? It was a roaring panic that emanated from deep within me. An insidious darkness that took over my mind.”

Eventually they’re reunited and face newly developing feelings for each other, something beyond friendship. Their first intimate time together is emotional, the first kiss so tender. Neither Tyler or Elian have ever had sex before; in fact, they are both demisexual and have never been attracted to anyone. Inexpert in every way, they decide it doesn’t matter if they do it the right way or the wrong way as long as they’re together. It’s beautiful and frantic and innocent. I love the demi representation.

In the beginning of the story, Tyler feels like a bit of an outsider even among his found family. They all have someone out there who cares about their well-being; Tyler has nobody. He doesn’t understand his worth and can’t comprehend his value as a friend and family member. He worries that the others will walk away from freight hopping and abandon him. But then at his lowest moment, he turns to Willow, Dodger, Killian, and Leo and they catch him before he falls. They show him that they are his home.

Ms. James’ books are so absorbing because she supports her love stories with substantial plots, complex characters and strong world building. We can feel the pain because of how effectively she gives voice to new adult angst. My tears flowed liberally during two poignant scenes with Elian. In one, Willow sits him down for a heart-to-heart pep talk-slash-ultimatum of sorts. The other relates to Jace, his older brother, best friend, and greatest advocate. My favorite element of the book – one so raw and heartfelt it choked me up – is one you’ll have to discover for yourself.

The descriptive narrative paints a vivid picture of Tyler and Elian’s experiences as they travel by rail and on foot through farmland, forests and fields. The soundtrack to their adventures is especially evocative. As the riders huddle in the cold on the train, they are accompanied by the rattling of the locomotive’s engine and the deafening clanging of the cars. The rain drums on the metal roof. In the forest the crickets play their song and owls hoot into the night, bringing the travels alive. The lingo lends an air of authenticity. Tyler says catching on the fly is always exhilarating. Reading the book was, too.

Don’t let anyone convince you Lost at the Crossing isn’t a tear jerker. I wept while reading about these lost boys. This might not be her most unbearable read in terms of sadness, but even moderate angst from the Queen of Kleenex results in more tissue usage than most authors. There’s something indefinable about first End of the Line and now Lost at the Crossing that makes them truly special.

So, I guess I have another impatient wait ahead – 70 days to be exact – for Dodger’s story. Sigh.

RATING: 

BUY LINK: 

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