Being offered a monthly column here at Love Bytes was an unexpectedly awesome Xmas present, but it did leave me in something of a quandary. What on earth was I going to say? I babble about books a lot. I go on about the genre all the time. And when you get right down to it, there isn’t much that writers are qualified to talk about except writing and the things they write about.
And that’s when I thought: well, if writing is what you can do, you should do that.
So, for my monthly Love Bytes column, I’m going to write a thing, and I’d like your help.
At the end of every post, I’ll ask for input to shape the story, and we’ll see where we are at the end of the year. I anticipate instalments being around a thousand words long, assuming I don’t get too excited.
To get me started then, I’ll need a genre, a pairing (anything queer, since we’re on a queer-focused blog), suggestions for characters and settings. Weird and wonderful is fine, but so is “set in Bristol.” This is also your opportunity to go to town a bit. If you want me to include a Siamese cat or a lunar colony or anything else then let me know. I can’t promise I’ll go for all of it, and obviously if the genre is “small town contemporary” that might cancel out “lunar colony.”
OR IT MIGHT NOT.
A few limitations: I’ve basically lived my entire life in the UK so if we’re looking at contemporary-stuff I’ll probably have to stick to places I know. I don’t think I could set a book in, oh I don’t know, Thailand without it being weird as hell, and probably appropriative. Also I’m not comfortable writing slavery or sexual abuse.
But anything else I’m totally game.
Comment below with your suggestions and let’s get this story started.
Alexis Hall is wastrel with a good hat. You can find him on his website, on Twitter, and occasionally on Facebook, which he doesn’t know how to use. He’ll be at Love Bytes on the 14th of every month, writing something he doesn’t yet know.
What fun! I will just throw out a few random things I love: historical, bookstore, or library as a setting; gargoyles or ghosts as a character; time travel.
I’m looking forward to seeing what others suggest, and of course, to see what you write as the months go on.
You are SO brave!
I love Carolyn’s suggestions so, thinking of things that might be complementary, how about an exceedingly large and lazy cat, and “A Hymn to Love” by Robert Herrick.
I love the ideas above so… how about a poetry loving ‘Giles’ style librarian (see Buffy the Vampire Slayer) whose only close friend is a large fat cat. When the cat disappears… he accidentally discovers a time portal in his stock cupboard…
Okay these are already bloody perfect.
Time portal needs to go to Victorian England at least once, please! (I volunteer facty services if required.)
I’m just a bit (read: a lot) gleeful over here. Kindred souls, you complete me.
😀 This is fun! I’d love a character with a heavy accent or dialect. Something tells me you can pull it off 🙂 I also like strange, vulnerable or colorful people.
Random story elements: A robot who’s found God, two slices of wensleydale with cranberries and a character who’s most easily identifiable by his/her/their shoes?
Also a character on the ACE spectrum would be amazing 🙂
Caz you are responsible for my first coffee snort of the day, what fabulous ideas!
Omg, Library, Time Travel, YES! One character could be a writer, librarian (or bookstore owner/clerk) – or more than one of these. Also, could there be a real historical person, preferably queer, as a character?
Ooh, ooh, maybe this character could actually be more than one different historical person, being immortal or an itinerant time traveler (time wanderer?) who has been several different people thru history, but no one realizes they are all the same person?
fantastic idea!
ooh, this is gonna be so much fuckin’ fun…
JAG you haven’t mentioned tentacles…
THEY ARE A GIVEN
I’m a sucker for stories about shy people falling in love and not having the slightest idea what to do about it.
A swashbuckler whose swashbuckle keeps catching on things mid-swashbuckle. But they don’t let that cramp their style.
I love this. LOVE.
What if the Giles-style-librarian’s cat originally belonged to the time-wanderer, and has cool special abilities of its own, but they got separated somehow? And it’s the time-wanderer’s only true friend too, so there is Conflict as well as Reluctant Attraction?
Also maybe the time-wanderer can change their sex at will, and has a very fluid gender identity because of it, and the sex they are at the moment doesn’t always correlate with whatever convention would expect of them in terms of apparent gender expression?
this looks like it’s going to be fun.
I know you like reality shows, so maybe you could include one in some way – either a character is participant (You can dance, The voice, or any other one you like), or the hsow is just an element in the story
just signing for comments
I really want a gargoyle to make an appearance. So much. It has nothing to do with the fact that I’m currently painting a gargoyle. (boldface lie)
If we’re going to Victorian England, could we have a steam powered octopus sub? Perhaps captained by a gargoyle? Whom the time wanderer needs for ….something.
Hope you don’t hate Leonard Cohen cause I have always wanted to know the story behind these lines-
“Suzanne takes you down to her place near the river
You can hear the boats go by
You can spend the night beside her
And you know that she’s half crazy
But that’s why you want to be there
And she feeds you tea and oranges
That come all the way from China
And just when you mean to tell her
That you have no love to give her …….”
Oh and you had to mention a Siamese cat…… my guy Caleb is yelling, ‘Me, me, me!’ while flexing his claws on my neck.
Oh I love ‘Suzanne’ !
Hey why am I Beverley Jansen now when I was bevjan59 for my other ones lol
There needs to be literature smuggling.
To wit:
– “We have just received intel that someone is smuggling counterfeit poetry again!”
– “Impossible. We’ve stopped up all the supply channels!”
– “Sir, we think they’re getting it directly from Victorian England.”
– “OMG!”
Also, Goethe as a sleuth. In a very cool greatcloak. Because someone has been smuggling his poetry, too…
I can’t wait–and all I can hold in my head right now is Shy Librarian meets adventurous tentacles…!
Okaaay, I was sure I signed up for comments the first time, but not getting them, so let’s try again.
I enjoyed your cottage pie recipe. Feel free to write about yummy foods!
I love this, too. I’m not very creative, though. Love the idea and can’t wait to see what you—we all—come up with!
I’m fairly relaxed as long as it isn’t sci-fi or fantasy. Bristol would be great!
I’d be happy for you to write about writing, if you wanted to, as well as actually writing. That’s a confusing sentence, but I’m sure you can work it out.