Review by Sadonna
TITLE: The Mercenary’s Guide to Mishaps and Romance
SERIES: The Hitman’s Guide
AUTHOR: Alice Winters
NARRATOR: Michael Ferraiuolo
PUBLISHER: Self-published
LENGTH: 10 hours and 9 minutes
RELEASE DATE: December 20, 2022
BLURB:
Ellis
Why is it that the first attractive man to look my way mistakes me for a bad guy, stuffs me in the trunk of his car, and ships me off to an island where I’m positive the only thing waiting for me is my own murder?
I mean… yeah, Tavish is charismatic and fun, but did I mention the whole trunk thing? Oh, maybe I forgot to mention his peculiar group of friends who keep promising to “help” me, but why are they running around with masks and weapons while praising fences?
Tavish and his friends are actually the bad guys, aren’t they?
If I (somehow) look past all of that… Tavish really does seem like a nice guy. He’s caring, funny, and willing to risk his life to protect me. It’s become quite clear that if I’m going to get out of this alive, I’m not going to be able to do it without him.
Tavish
So maybe I mixed things up a wee bit and took Ellis on a tiny road trip that he might not have been privy to. Ellis doesn’t seem to overly mind. I mean, yeah, maybe he tried blinding me with aerosol spray… or maybe I was just blinded by his handsome smile.
The problem is that Ellis is in danger, but he knows nothing about this world he’s been thrown into. He’s sweet, kind, and has the biggest heart of anyone I’ve ever met. And I’m prepared to protect it at all costs.
Contains a charming man who lays on a Scottish accent to get his way, a bewildered vet tech who’s wondering why everyone around him is so strange, a parrot who may or may not want to steal Tavish’s man, and the Hitman’s Guide crew up to their usual hijinks.
REVIEW:
Note: This is the seventh book in this series and as such contains major spoilers for all of the previous books. In addition, this really can’t be read as a standalone – it just won’t make much sense 😉
Ellis is have a really really bad day. He’s getting ready to leave his job as a vet tech when he’s bashed into a dumpster and then kidnapped by Tavish. Tavish is being paid to bring in this serial killer by the father of one of his victims. Or so he thinks 😉 Ellis, who is just about the nicest and most mild-mannered guy on the planet keeps trying to explain he’s innocent. But nobody seems to believe him – including Leland and Jackson and Cassel. Really weird because Jackson and Leland’s dog loves Ellis during vet visits 😀
Tavish isn’t buying it though and so he whisks Ellis off to the island of the man who is paying him. But then when he gets there, Arthur, the bad guys, in intent on torturing Ellis to find his father. Whaaa? That is not what Tavish signed up for. Ellis is getting beaten up in an effort to get him to talk and Tavish is trying to figure out how to get off the island. Things are NOT going well.
Eventually they (and strangely a vase from Arthur’s house) do make it off the island in the most fantastical of ways 🙂 Ellis is not cut out for any of this. And the fact that he is STILL so nice to everyone is concerning. Except to Leland who has not decided that Ellis is his new favorite.
There are mysteries galore here. Like what is Ellis’s dad’s part in all of this? Who really killed Arthur’s daughter? Why are Leland and Jackson and Cassel and Jeremy helping? Even Henry is in on it. And of course Leland has a new audience for “THE FENCE” and his origin story 😛
There are chases and boat rides and plane rides and naming of guns and people and escape rooms and even some sexy times. And of course many LOL moments along the way. Tavish and Ellis surprisingly seem to get each other though and there life will certainly never be boring 😉
For fans of this series, there are loads of things to love and keep the laughter going. I loved Tavish in past books and it’s good to see his fixation with Jackson lessening 😉 Leland is happy about this as well – and he love Ellis so . . . I have no idea if Alice is planning to keep the good times going but I certainly hope so! I love these series and lord knows we could all use some laughs right now!
Michael Ferraiuolo is the absolute best. This series is so good. He keeps the crazy going here in the absolute best possible way. There is music. And rapping. And chase scenes and suspense. You name it, he keeps the laughter coming. This series and this author/narrator combo are sheer perfection. I guarantee this will be a re-listen again and again. Highly recommended.
RATING: 
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