Reviewed by Cindy
TITLE: F**k, Marry, Kill Me, Daddy
AUTHOR: Lance Lansdale
PUBLISHER: Self-published
LENGTH: 242 Pages
RELEASE DATE: June 21st, 2024
BLURB:
My boyfriend’s been trying to kill me for weeks. Well, I guess he’s my boyfriend. I mean, we’ve never officially been introduced, but he’s always standing in the shadows, watching me. That has to be a good sign, right? The first time I saw him, he was hunched down in my bushes, aiming a rifle at my heart, and he’s turned up with a new weapon every night since. As fun as our silly little game of Murder Daddy may be, I’m getting tired of having to steal my stalker-slash-boyfriend’s affection by disarming him and using his weapons against him.
BRODY
I’ve got to get my head in the game. As my agency’s top assassin, I’ve killed my fair share of men. When Senator Levinson placed his son on my hitlist, I figured it would be a one-and-done. I was wrong. Every time our paths cross, he winds up getting the upper hand. The things he makes me do once he’s pried a gun or a knife out of my hand are downright depraved, and for some reason, I can’t bring myself to stop it from happening. My wife tells me I need to just suck it up and get the job done. My wife’s boyfriend says I’m sweet on the guy, which is absolutely ridiculous. Even if I wanted to take advantage of our open marriage, I’m not gay. This man—this Freakshow—is completely unhinged, and the worst part is, I think I might be just as crazy as him.
F**ck, Marry, Kill Me, Daddy is a high-heat, over-the-top, absolutely UNHINGED, dual-POV, dark romcom that is equal parts insta-love and insta-lust. While one character is married, their marriage is open, and there’s no cheating between them.
REVIEW:
I’m going to start this review by saying that I picked this story up for review because it has the most unhinged premise I’d ever read. I knew it would either be absolutely terrible or one of the best things I ever read. And lucked out because it was pretty damn good!
Let’s start with Scotty. He is the most adorable, ostrich with his head in the sand, crazy character I’ve ever met. I mean I’ve met people like him in real life, but this guy takes the cake. At first you think he’s kind of a dumbass who’s imagination runs away with him, but he turns out to be be so brave and sweet and so much fun.
Brody actually kind of made me sad. He’s so stuck about who he is and what he wants, and he tortures himself (or gets Scotty to do it for him) for a long time before coming to terms with himself.
Listen, I knew this story was going to be funny. How could it not be? And it was. The banter between Scotty and Brody is hilarious! But, I wasn’t expecting to get so emotional while reading this. When Scotty is sad and his heart is breaking, I found myself tearing up. When Brody is being so hard on himself, I did cry.
Watching these two guys struggle to figure out how to live their lives together was a fanatical, ridiculous, heart-wrenching, roller-coaster of a ride. Brody’s wife and her boyfriend are hot and cute, and some of the side characters we meet along the way just add to the riot of emotions this story brings on.
The sex is steamy and sweet and all kinds of crazy. I’m trying so hard to tell you how awesome this book is without giving too much away, but it is definitely my favorite comedy read of the year so far.
This is a new-to-me author and I will absolutely be checking out anything else this guy has written and I will be keeping my eyes open for future stories.
RATING: 
BUY LINKS: