Reviewed by Becca

TITLE: The Ruin of Me

SERIES: Juxtan #3

AUTHOR: Tricia Owens

PUBLISHER: self published

LENGTH: 141 pages

RELEASE DATE: September 22, 2019

BLURB:

Hadrian ni Leyanon, though a member of a mission to bring his sorcerous father to justice, possesses no friends in the land of Juxtan. With a bounty on his head sure to attract every mercenary in the land, he already deals with the most dangerous: his former lover Caled. Hadrian can present no defense against the cocky, confident mercenary, but he isn’t so certain that he wants one.

Hadrian is the bane of Caled’s existence. He is a silver-eyed peddler of lies. Magickally bound to him, Caled is unable to kill him, but he is determined to make the sorcerer suffer. Unfortunately, the longer Caled spends in his company, the more he learns of Hadrian’s cruel past and how it shaped him into the man Caled fell in love with.

As the two men and their fellows pursue Hadrian’s father along the coast, Caled and Hadrian must confront the emotions that should no longer exist between them. They are enemies. They are supposed to hate each other. Yet in the shadowy abode of a society of the insane, they must rely on each other to survive.

REVIEW:

Man, I really wish sometimes we could reach in books and smack some people. This has been a hard series because of things that have happened. One MC is in mourning and constant guilt over what has happened because of him and the other refuses to listen beyond his anger and grief to see what is truly going on behind the scenes, so to speak. And although, I understand his grief, I want to shake him to get him to see what hell has been really going on. I love this series, though. I am definitely addicted.

Hadrian couldn’t be more sorry for what has happened. But Caled won’t let him forget. As if he ever could. As if the tortures of his life for years have suddenly escaped his mind. As if what his father has done to him and through him will never stop haunting him at every turn. But Caled refuses to see that Hadrian’s father was and is behind everything. Hadrian doesn’t absolve himself from his part in it. In fact, he would rather die because of it. But all Caled wants to do is constantly dig at him and then remind them of the chemistry they had by taunting him that way and then telling him he hates him. He refuses to see beyond what he wants to see. And for that Caled will never see the truth. Only what he believes is the truth. Which is far off in a lot of ways. But all Hadrian wants to do is rid the world of his father if he can. And maybe himself in the process. He doesn’t want to hurt Caled in the process because of their bond, but if he can rid the world of his father and himself, maybe it would be worth it. Or maybe Manix could fix Caled. But Hadrian’s father has done nothing but lay traps for them or cause people to turn even more against them and the consequences are becoming very dangerous in many ways.

I feel for Hadrian so bad. Caled just won’t stop. Yes, Hadrian may be at fault for his role, but not by choice or will. Being forced to do something is just making all that much worse. I wish I could just smack Caled for what he’s doing. He refuses to let go of his anger and hurt to see the total truth of all that has been happening and it is bringing Hadrian down even further. Hadrian is basically just a shell of a man because of all that’s happened. He’s been tortured for years by his father, raped, beaten, and now the cruelty of Caled is neverending. How much does one man have to endure? It’s so not fair and it breaks my heart for Hadrian. He didn’t ask for what he’s been through. He’d rather the Earth just swallow him whole or something. He wished Manix had never healed him to keep him alive when Caled killed him. He would have finally been free. And that makes me even sadder. That his life is so invaluable to himself, he would rather die then try to live and see what life really has to offer. But after all he’s been through, I can’t say I blame him.

This is a damn good series. But man, at times it is very hard to swallow. Hadrian has been through hell and continues to do so. I want him to finally be able to find peace. And be able to move on. This is the only time I would wish he could even have his wish of death, in order to finally be free. And that is the saddest of all. That it would take death for an HEA. I’m anxious to see how the author is going to turn this next book out. And I hope for once, Hadrian can finally breathe.

RATING: 

BUY LINK: 

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