When I started to take writing seriously (because I’ve been writing since I was a teen but had always been told it would never be more than a hobby), I read all the books and blog posts I could find on creative writing. And trust me, there were a LOT. I read as many as I could and took notes. Yes, I am that person, haha.

One common theme seemed to emerge from all these blog posts and books: there was a certain way you had to write. They all had the same advice over and over again. Show don’t tell. Don’t use adverbs. You have to plot your entire book before you start writing. Eliminate redundant words. Always use an editor. Don’t start a book with weather. Don’t let a character look in the mirror to describe themselves.

The list was long, but everyone and their mother kept repeating them, so I took all of this as the gospel truth. In fact, I made a list and followed it to the letter. I spent weeks plotting a young adult novel I wanted to write. Weeks. Because that’s what all these books told me to do. I made index cards that described the goal of each scene, the character’s change, the level of intensity of the scene (because pacing), and much more. It was more complicated than a freaking math test, not kidding.

By the time I finally started writing, a lot of the fun and excitement were gone. After all, I had already rehashed the plot so many times that writing out the scenes felt a little like painting by numbers. Nothing wrong with that, but it wasn’t what triggered my creativity. I got super discouraged, because here was this way to write everyone was advocating, and I couldn’t do it.

It took me way too long to realize the truth: everyone writes differently. You have to give yourself permission to do it your way. Some authors plot, others don’t. J.K. Rowling used a TON of adverbs in her Harry Potter books, and we all know how that turned out. One of my favorite books was unedited the first time I read it, and I still loved it for the story.

Is all this advice utter BS? No, of course not. There’s truth in each of these tips. But that doesn’t mean they’re the only way. That doesn’t mean that if you break one of these rules, you’re a “bad” writer. That doesn’t mean there’s no deviating from these left or right. You gotta find your own way.

This morning, I watched a Masterclass with David Baldacci, arguably one of the most successful thriller authors in the world. He said that he only plots his books partially, and that he doesn’t often know how the book will end other than a very broad idea. I loved hearing that from someone like him. He also said that his writing method has changed over the years, so that proves as well there’s no one way.

All I want to say is this: when you give yourself permission to write things your way, that’s when the magic will happen. The first book I wrote where I really experienced this was No Filter…and we all know the rest of that story.

And by the way, I think this is true for way more than writing. Be yourself. Do things your way. That’s where the magic is.