As an author, talking about reviews is tricky business. One one hand, we all want and need reviews, but on the other hand, we fear them as well. No one ever likes criticism, and negative reviews can be hard on our self confidence.

But rest assured, this is not a rant against negative reviews. On the contrary, it’s a whole-hearted embrace of them. You see, it’s perfectly okay not to like a book. There, I’ve said it. In fact, there are more than a few very popular MM romances that I didn’t like. Some were even DNFs for me. And that’s perfectly okay.

It’s a cliché to say that tastes differ, but that’s what it really comes down to at the end of the day. So I wanted to unpack that a little and show why we may not like certain books, just to help us all come to terms with this.

First of all, we have different reasons to read. For me, reading is an escape from reality, a way to feel good. That means I read books that make me happy, even if it takes some struggles and tears to get there. I need a happy end. That doesn’t mean that books that don’t have a HEA are not valid or needed or can’t be good, but they’re not a good fit for me. I can take a lot of darkness and angst, but I need a happy end. If a book doesn’t have that, that will mean I probably won’t like it…and that’s okay.

We also come into a book with different backgrounds, different baggage, a different culture even. Sometimes, you come across things in a book that rub you the wrong way because of your own experiences. Other readers may not even notice it, or may feel it’s insignificant, but you do, and as a result, the book doesn’t work for you. That’s perfectly okay. Granted, it does help when you’re aware of what frustrates you.

To give an example from my own experience, I’m kinda allergic to “the big misunderstanding.” It’s when the main characters have a fight or even break up over something that could have been solved with ten minutes of open, honest conversation. This has everything to do with personal frustrations over lack of communications and probably with me being Dutch and super direct myself. Any book that has a conflict like that just frustrates me. That doesn’t mean it’s a bad book. It means the book doesn’t work for me…and that’s okay.

Then there’s the simple fact of different preferences in writing style. I’m a super commercial reader, for lack of a better word. I’ve always been. Literary fiction is just not my thing, just like I prefer commercial movies and TV series over more experimental and indie ones. Nothing wrong with that, just how I’m wired. It means in terms of writing, I prefer fast-paced books with limited descriptions and inner monologue. If authors tend to write slower, with more drawn-out descriptions or lots of backstory, it’s probably not a book I’ll really enjoy. And that’s okay.

I can think of many other aspects that are super personal, but that can make or break a book for you. Editing errors, for example. Some readers can ignore these, others are bothered so much it takes away from their reading pleasure. The way a story is told, like first person or third, present or past tense. I recently read a book that had an unusual POV (point of view, who’s telling the story) and I couldn’t get through it, because it kept yanking me out of the story. Others loved it, however, so it was clearly a personal preference. Or specific story elements, like kink or taboo. No matter how popular daddy kink is, for example, it’s okay not to like it.

And sometimes, I simply don’t like a book and can’t even pinpoint why. It just didn’t work for me, somehow. At the end of the day, tastes do differ, and we should grant each other the space not to like something, even if the majority does. It’s okay not to like a book. It really is.