A warm welcome to author Rachel Sparks joining us today here on our blog !
Rachel talks about abuse, pride and her story Giving Love A Chance , she also shares an excerpt and brought a giveaway
Welcome Rachel 🙂
On September 12 I went to my first Pride March and Festival. A drag queen, Delighted To Be Here, spoke to the crowd and she said something that was profound. Her words resonated with me.
She was talking about protesters and said she had three rules when dealing with them:
1} Ignore
2} Ignore
3} Ignore
Her rationale? These people have been preparing for years and they have thought of an answer for everything you say.
I thought about her words. I thought about how they could be applied to everyone from racial bigots to economic snobs; from family to friends when they have an agenda; and from lovers to abusers. There will always be someone that has mastered the skill of twisting our beautiful language into something painful and hateful. As an author I know the power of words. They can build someone up or tear someone down. For someone that has been abused, like I have, words can cut deeply, acting like a sword. I spend each day working to be open; to not hide behind the wall that I build to protect myself. I analyze everything that is said, trying to find the negative component. I internalize everything that people say to me. I take everything personally.
As a survivor I can tell you that ignoring the words spoken around me can be a very hard thing to do. The ones that hurt the most are when people say things like “why don’t they leave? They could just walk away…” or “I’d never be in a relationship like that…” Until someone has been in a relationship that becomes abusive most people do not understand the complexities of it.
As an author I have the unique ability to help people understand the complicated relationship between an abuser and a survivor. I wrote “Giving Love A Chance” to help people understand what the survivor goes through before, during and after the abusive relationship.
That finding the strength to walk away does not mean that the survivor is okay. I wanted my readers to grasp the fact that survivors are much like soldiers or police or firemen or nurses or car accident victims… or anyone that has gone thru traumatic or violent events.
Survivors have triggers. Words, actions, smells, places… they all act as triggers that can cause a flight or fight response. For someone to trust again… to find someone to love… to open themselves up to the possibility of being hurt again takes a giant leap of faith. They have already been in one relationship where their trust in humanity has been violated. “Giving Love A Chance” tells the story of one man and his struggle to find the faith to trust not only a potential life partner but himself. While every relationship is unique, those that have survived an abusive relationship will find elements that resonate with them. For those survivors… I wanted you to know you are not alone. That somebody understands. I wanted to tell my story.
Book Blurb
The perfect life was just a lie…
John Burrows had a wonderful husband who loved him. The job of his dreams. He had a loving family, loyal friends and adoring fans. His life was everything a man could hope for until it fell apart. Society says it does not happen, that it is all a lie, so John hid the truth from everyone until it was almost too late.
The truth was revealed…
Ben Tensley thought that meeting your soulmate on the most traumatic night of his life was hard. He discovered that watching the man you love try and heal in the middle of chaos was even harder. Ben and John struggle to find solid ground…until John’s nightmare returns.
Will John be strong enough to give love a chance?
This book deals with domestic abuse. I, myself am a survivor of domestic abuse.
Buy Link:
John looked down at their hands and then laced his fingers with Ben’s.
Ben placed his hand lightly on John’s check. He stared deeply into John’s eyes. Ben could see the pain no matter how hard John tried to hide it. “Are you going to let me in John?”
John swallowed and licked his lips.
Ben leaned in closer and closer to John. He was so close that John could feel the hot breath against his lips. He closed his eyes as he felt Ben press his mouth firmly, offering no resistance. He let Ben explore the depths of his mouth with his tongue. Ben knew this was more than just a connection. This was what he had been yearning for all these years. John was exactly what he needed.
John put his hands on Ben’s chest and pushed him away. He could feel his heart pounding and hear it in his ears. “Wait… stop… please.”
Ben raised his hands and moved back. “I’m sorry, I thought you…”
John got up and walked over and placed his hands on a nearby table with his head down. He was trying to calm down. He felt fear gripping him.
Ben got up and walked over to the table. “Hey…”
John stood up. “Could you just back up please? I need some breathing room.”
Ben raised his hands and backed up. “I’m sorry.” Ben could have kicked himself. He had taken it too far and he knew it. At this rate he would never have a chance for a relationship with John.
John picked up a bottle of wine and poured himself a glass. He drained the entire glass in a matter of minutes.
“You want me to leave?”
John ignored Ben and filled his glass again, draining it quickly before slamming it on the table. “Hell no! I just need some space dammit!”
Ben walked around the table and took the wine bottle. “Look, I’m not going to stand here watch you drink an entire bottle of wine and cuss me out.”
John tried to reach for his wine bottle. “Then leave!”
Ben wouldn’t let him have the wine bottle. “I am not going to let you start drinking when you feel nervous around me. I’m not going to rape you. You wanted me to stop, and I did.”
John was curling his hands into fists.
BIO
Rachel Sparks grew up in South Carolina .With a degree in Early Childhood education and one in social work, she brings those skills to the table to write stories involving current social issues, a sprinkling of romance and powerful story lines.
Social Links
https://www.facebook.com/RachelSparksAuthor
https://twitter.com/sparkstheauthor
https://www.amazon.com/author/rachelsparks
http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/2283843.Rachel_Sparks
Rachel is graciously offering an ecopy of Giving Love A Chance to one Lucky reader
Leave a comment to enter the giveaway 🙂
Thanks for the chance! The book sounds interesting, I look forward to it.
I’m very interested in reading this. Abuse is horrid and I’m sorry that you were subjected to it. I’m sure your book will touch several. Thanks for a chance in the giveaway.
I’m intrigued with the blurb and excerpt. Congrats on the new book.
Congratulations on the release and looking forward to reading it! This sounds like a very interesting book. Trust is so very hard to gain and so easily shattered.
Congratulations on your new book. Thank you for bringing to light that men can also become victims. No one is exempt.
This looks like an intens read, especially because it is written by someone who has been through domestic abuse, and i’m glad to read that you survived it. Thanks for this post and the giveaway chance.
It sounds intense, but very affecting!
Every writer puts himself in his book,but when such sensitive subject is involved and when the books is somewhat based on author’s personal experience,than it means something more than another work of fiction…thanks for sharing this with us.
The post is really meaningful and the book sounds like emotional read…all the more because you as a survivor wrote it.
Thanks for the giveaway.
congrats Milica 🙂