When Life Doesn’t Bow to Your Will

There are no guarantees. Life isn’t fair. No one ever promised you a rose garden. It is what it is. Clichés are a huge no-no for writers, but they exist for a reason – they tend to be true.

Some of you may know that after a long period of time where I wrote full-time while also working full-time, I reached the point where I could quit my day job altogether. It was a huge inner sigh of relief. I had all these amazing plans leading up to the big moment. When it finally happened, all my co-workers who I was closer to and who knew of my writing goals, joined me for a night out to celebrate. It was a whole new, exciting beginning.

It lasted about a month. Without going into the overwhelming and confusing details, I’m in the middle of a family emergency that’s taken me out of town indefinitely. After the first few days of scrambling to pull myself together, get a last minute flight, panic packing – where I forgot half of what I needed and brought useless items – I’ve reached a point in this crisis where I’ve had to come to terms with some immediate realities. All my author-at-home plans are on hold indefinitely because my family comes first.

I’ll still be writing. Nothing will change in terms of that – release schedules, deadlines and so on. I quit my day job, right? This is my job now. I think most of you out there couldn’t simply walk away from employment without money coming in from elsewhere to keep you alive. Yes – as part of my ‘full-time writer’ plans, I put money away (hence the brain destroying amounts of sleep deprivation I experienced when doing both jobs!), but my current situation demands I provide financial support as well as my physical presence. Hmm.

My first reaction to all of this was severe anxiety over the situation my family’s in. The second one was depression that the course I’d carefully constructed for my life this coming year was upended, stomped on, then tossed over a cliff. But after the initial shock wore off, I realized something else very significant. I’m incredibly blessed by my circumstances.

Before you send me off to the mental ward, consider this: I don’t have a day job. I have savings. I can work virtually from anywhere on this planet. I don’t have set hours within any given day – I make them. Holy crap. *wipes sweat off forehead* I can do this! There may be heaps of unpleasantness coming my way for a while, but I can do this. If I hadn’t put money away, if I hadn’t worked so diligently to reach my goals as a writer – I don’t know what I’d do right now. It’s too terrifying to even contemplate.

I’m okay, I promise. I’ll still be seeing everyone at the cons I signed up for. I’ll still be releasing and writing on schedule (with some room for error – thank the stars and moon for my publisher), I’ll just be doing it from somewhere I hadn’t planned on in less than ideal circumstances.

Right now? I have to run and go take care of something – but I can come back later and work. I’ll see you all around – thank you for the opportunity to not only make a living as a writer, but to have a way to escape into my head in a positive way when things get to be too much in the coming months. More than any financial considerations – the writing will likely save my sanity. Hugs to all.