Reviewed by Carissa
TITLE: Snowman With Benefits
AUTHOR: Marshall Thornton
PUBLISHER: Self-published
LENGTH: 39 pages
BLURB:
Desperate to win a neighborhood snowman contest, Trey pulls out all the stops. He and his boyfriend, Landon, work all morning to make a snowman along the lines of Michelangelo’s David. Unfortunately, all does not go well, and the two break up over Trey’s relentless perfectionism. Struggling to take a nap that afternoon, Trey is awakened by the sound of someone in his house. He goes downstairs to find the snowman has come to life – and he’s horny!
REVIEW:
I quite enjoyed the last book I read by Marshall Thornton, so when this request came in, I didn’t ponder it too long before I decided to pick it up. December is the month of many many Christmas shorts, and I thought this one sounded rather quirky and fun.
Trey really is a perfectionist, and I can relate to him. I don’t go quite as insane as he does over Christmas, but I’ve been known to throw a hissy before over other people’s inability to emulate by brilliant perfection. However, when he goes all Christmas-nazi at his boyfriend over Landon’s lack of drive to create the Most Perfect Snowman EVER, he perhaps goes a bit far. Or at least Landon thinks so, because he dumps Trey’s perfect ass. Put out, and annoyed at the Christmas dumping, Trey wishes he could find someone as perfect as him…and as perfect as the snowman he has erected in his front lawn. He really should have been more careful about what he wishes, though, because the perfect (snow)man might be a bit more cool and frosty than he imagined.
I wasn’t too sure how I was going to react to the whole frosty fucking. Not because I have a thing about sleeping with the snowmen (which, now that I think about it, that sounds like a terrible idea. Talk about a bad place to be experiencing frostbite) since Trey and Landon are clearly kuput during the extracurriculars…but no-strings dickings are not always something I enjoy reading about. And that made this part of the story a bit of a rough sell for me. It didn’t help that Mr. My Dick Is As Frozen Solid As My Heart was an asshole. I just felt bad that Trey ever met the douche. Yeah, Trey had been a bit of an ass himself to Landon, but this seemed like a harsh way to learn a lesson.
This was an interesting Christmas story about being able to accept other people’s faults (and recognizing that you are not as perfect as you think you are). However I couldn’t help but feel that everyone was being a bit harsh to Trey. Yeah he needed to loosen up, but dumping him like that was an extreme reaction. Everyone gets a little nutso during the holidays, so I think allowances need to be made.
I also wanted those kids to lose. I really did. I don’t know what kind of person that makes me, but there ya go.
RATING: 
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