Reviewed by Nikyta

TITLE: Just What the Truth Is
SERIES: Home #5
AUTHOR: Cardeno C.
PUBLISHER: Dreamspinner Press
LENGTH: 200 pages
BLURB: Ben Forman has been in the closet so long he’s convinced himself he’s actually straight. But his denial train gets derailed when hotshot lawyer Micah Trains walks into his life. Micah is brilliant, funny, and determined… and he just assumes Ben’s gay and starts dating him. Finding himself truly happy for the first time he can remember, Ben doesn’t have the willpower to resist.

Still, life isn’t all rainbows and happily-ever-afters. Ben loves his family, but his parents have been estranged from his brother, Noah, since he came out of the closet. Ben doesn’t want to lose them, but Micah won’t be his dirty little secret forever. Suddenly Ben’s hold on his happiness and his sense of self seems to be slipping. If he’s going to survive with his heart intact, he’ll have to own up to the truth of what he wants and who he is. The trouble is figuring out just what that truth is.

REVIEW:

Ben Forman’s life is lonely… and miserable. He’s so deep in the closet, everything he does makes him paranoid he’ll be taken as gay. He lives the typical ‘straight man’s’ life so that no one would think there’s something ‘wrong’ with him. When he meets Micah Trains, the new partner at his law firm, his constant denial soon disappears when Ben learns just what happiness means in the arms of Micah. Unfortunately, Ben’s still in the closet and Micah’s openly gay, with Ben’s paranoia and denial, can they make a relationship work? Or will Ben screw up the only happiness he’s ever had because of a little cowardice?

The premise of the story is something that I really enjoyed reading. I liked the back and forth within Ben: his struggle to accept being gay and being happy with Micah while wanting to keep his old, safe life by faking who he is. At times, it did get a little overwhelming because Ben is very much in denial but I liked that Micah was able to wear him down and show him how much his life was missing, even if Micah didn’t realize that was what he was doing. Ben, as a character, is very lost, innocent and most of all naive. He thinks in a very stereotypical way, which is why he has so many emotional problems. I absolutely adored Micah. He’s so sweet, loving, tender, strong but he’s also a steady rock with his calmness. It broke my heart whenever Ben would string Micah along through one of his panics. It was sad but I could understand why Ben was so messed up… I just hated that Micah had to go through Ben’s mood swings.

While I enjoyed the story, there were two things that really bugged me. One, there was too much sex for my liking and, two, I didn’t like the style in which this one was written. It’s told in a way where Ben ‘speaks’ directly to the reader, talking to you as if you are right there and he’s literally telling you a story. Personally, I’m not very fond of this style especially mixed with the foreshadowing that occurred a few times. I would start to really get into the story and then Ben would make a comment, talking to the reader, him telling us not to laugh at him or commenting that he knows we want to smack him, etc. that would pull me out of it. To be honest, I was actually struggling with the book for a while because of this but then I got to this part in the story:

…when I became distracted by Micah’s mother once again. She was talking to Micah in what I think was supposed to be a whisper but really wasn’t.

“So tell me this, is he circumcised?”

That’s it. I was scarred for life.

“Are you fucking kidding me right now, Mom? Did you seriously just ask me about my partner’s penis?”

Which pulled me back into it. After this point, I found myself enjoying the story again, even laughing a few times. Although, that was because of Micah’s family who were absolutely hilarious. Then the ending came and I found it bittersweet, a little. It ends with an HEA that I adored but I just wished it had been taken slower, less telling and more showing of the whole process that takes place. Hell, that whole last chapter probably could have been turned into a novella sized story because of how much time and events that happen.

In the end, this was a good story. I didn’t care for the style but I ultimately liked the characters and what they go through. I adored their connection and even though I wanted to smack some sense into Ben a few times, I’m happy with where it left off. If you’ve enjoyed Cardeno’s stories in the past and like the Home series then you’ll enjoy this one as well.

Nikyta rates it – 

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